Coffee and Orgasms: The 2021 Program That Helps Women Break Their Silence on Sexual Trauma

Rhonda Swan
8 min readFeb 15, 2021

The world can be an ugly place sometimes. No matter how perfect your life may start out, there’s always the possibility that it may take a tragic and unexpected turn. But that doesn’t mean that life isn’t worth living, and it doesn’t mean that you can’t bounce back.

Suffering in silence is one of the hardest things for the human mind to bear. The suffocating feeling of having negative memories stuck inside you that you’re unable to express is paralyzing because you don’t know how to break the bindings that silence has had on you for so long.

It can truly make the trauma much worse and amplify the impact that it has on your life in the long-term. Thankfully, all is not lost. For those who want to free themselves from toxic shame and get on with their lives, Dayana Muñoz is here to help with your liberation.

Coffee and Orgasms: The Most Anticipated Sexual Trauma Recovery Program of 2021

The program Coffee and Orgasms — which is set to launch on April 2021 — has received attention lately due to the all-angle approach that it will use to help students move past the negative experiences that have haunted their past and memories.

A big difference between Coffee and Orgasms versus other programs is that it was started by a single person — not to mention a woman who has gone through sexual abuse herself.

Dayana Muñoz plans to turn her negative experiences into a positive platform so she can help others get past the challenges she faced. What really impressed us when we spoke to Muñoz is the fact that she’s essentially like a strong, female protagonist right out of a movie.

She was born in Colombia but migrated to the US when she was only seven years old. For most of Muñoz’ life, America has been her home. Being raised by her mother taught her that women can go from victimhood to empowerment. Dayana’s mom taught her that there is always a choice to heal, love, and forgive in any story. That’s the same message that she wants to relay to all her students once the course launches.

It’s clear that Muñoz has her heart in this course and that passion will always translate to better results across the board. In fact, the name itself reminds us that love, trust, and support are the cornerstones of any healthy life.

The coffee in Coffee and Orgasms symbolizes the meaningful conversations that people can share while having a nice, warm coffee. That feeling of being able to open up in a safe, judgment-free environment with a delicious beverage in hand.

“Orgasms” partially stands for restoring a positive relationship with sexual pleasure, but that’s not the whole story. It also signifies the closest you can be to a person. A connection that’s so deep and robust that you’d have faith in them to catch you whenever you fall.

Muñoz explains that it also signifies a declaration of pleasure in all areas of a woman’s life: love, family, and business. She says, “It’s about inviting someone to a home of daily connection and joy.

To openly discuss desires as women, with faith and courage, that a healed life is possible.

The problem isn’t going away

Issues of sexual abuse have been around for millennia and they’re not going to disappear on their own. There’s a lot that can be done to minimize the scale of the issue but in the meantime, it’s equally important to help those who have already been through negative experiences.

It’s essential that we get them the support they need to transcend the trauma and be a voice of positivity for the others in the world who need a beacon of hope in their darkest hours. Getting back the sense of freedom, self-worth, and control over one’s life is the only path forward.

Statistics show that an American is sexually assaulted every 73 seconds — that’s almost one per minute. There’s an ever-growing population that has endured traumatic events yet there are not enough people to help them get through it. That’s why Muñoz wants to fill this gap.

Annually, there are over 400,000 victims of sexual assault and rape in the United States alone. 54% are between the ages of 18 and 34. By 1998, there were a total of 17.7 million American women that had been a victim of rape, including both attempted and completed rape statistics.

Female college students between the ages of 18 and 24 are three times more likely to experience sexual violence than the gender average. Perhaps the most staggering statistic is that one out of every six women has been the victim of rape in their lifetime.

“A third of women who are raped contemplate suicide. That trend will continue to rise if we don’t do our part to support those who have gone through more than anyone ever should. They need comfort and the chance to speak out in order to live their life with confidence.” — Dayana Muñoz

The C&O Approach

#1 Release

Releasing shame is the starting point of the C&O approach. Muñoz knows that it’s not going to happen overnight, but getting started on this aspect of recovery right away produces the best results overall.

By providing a safe environment, the need for secrets is taken out of the equation. Imagine what a life without secrets would feel like. That’s the exact type of liberated space that Muñoz creates for students so that they can explore their full selves.

Getting rid of self-blame, illuminating the path to a shame-free life, and learning to heal all come once you let go of secrets. Various techniques are utilized within C&O from esoteric tantra yoga to shamanic healing and weekly self-care therapy.

Every pattern of self-sabotage needs to be left in the past. Dayana Muñoz teaches everyone she comes across to recognize themselves as someone worthy of love, abundance, and everything their soul desires — no less than what they deserve.

Forgiveness comes through communal support and abandoning internal struggles.

#2 Reclaim

Human beings are hardwired to thrive on pleasure and joy. As much as society may gratify those who work themselves to death or abandon any hope of social interaction in the name of financial prosperity, what really matters is the underlying happiness that drives your existence.

The mission of our species has gone beyond survival and towards playfulness, as well as exploring our inner selves through the freedom we have. When you let go of fears that haunt your past, you begin to dream again.

Invite what you desire and allow yourself to be happy. That’s how you reclaim your life.

#3 Rebirth

After releasing the things that hold you back and reclaiming your sources of happiness, you’ll be ready for the rebirth that’s been waiting inside for years. It’s all about being patient with yourself as you incrementally move towards that state of readiness.

“Allow yourself to lead with patience and forgiveness when you enter this journey. The change will not happen overnight, but the joy and wholeness will arrive during these breakthrough moments.”
- Dayana Muñoz

Identifying Triggers

In addition to the three-step process, Coffee and Orgasms also identifies potential triggers. Dayana does this in an effort to help everyone live a life of empowerment regardless of any negative experiences that they may have had in the past.

This doesn’t mean that triggers will be eliminated completely. Suppressing emotions is never the answer. Rather, the program focuses on helping students become strong women with space for their own emotions. Her program offers the best approach to managing these emotions with compassion and love.

At the end of the day, it’s all about creating healthy boundaries against these triggers.

The Muñoz Message

Dayana closed our interview with the following message.

“I used to blame my difficult past for my present suffering. I burdened myself with that weight, carrying heavy baggage on my chest for what felt like an eternity. The sheer grief one experiences when they lose their sense of safety and family cannot be put into words. The excruciatingly toxic relationship of self-hate lingered for eons.

Picking myself up and putting the pieces of my life back together was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do — but also the most rewarding. I now see past the trauma and acknowledge the blessings in my life. Blessings like compassion, unconditional love, and self-forgiveness are priceless in the pursuit of a happy life. Today, I have immense gratitude for that connection with my body and heart.

I’m grateful to be alive and loving myself every day. All of this, my entire path of redemption, started with that first step of healing: speaking up and releasing my voice. Self-empowerment is the only way to reclaim the story of your life. Anyone can do it, it’s all about taking that first step.

Coffee and Orgasms provides an intimate setting suitable for healing. It’s the launchpad towards a beautiful new reality that can be created. Everyone’s life is their own story, and only they can rewrite it. During that process, a little guidance and support can go a long way.

Wherever you are in your healing journey, I’m inviting you to welcome yourself back into the light. Start loving yourself, make the hurting stop, and experience all the unforgettable and pleasurable moments you’ve been missing out on. That’s my message to everyone suffering in silence out there.”

Conclusion

It’s reassuring to see society move towards a culture of support and speaking out about past experiences, however painful they may be. Talking about these traumas helps us understand them, get past them, and live the full life we were meant to have.

If you’ve never gone through sexual abuse, then it might be hard for you to grasp the feeling that comes with it. This is a major obstacle if you want to be a source of comfort for your partner, spouse, friend, or sibling.

You don’t need to feel helpless forever just because you’re unable to fully relate to the negative experiences that they’ve been through. Being there for them and even encouraging them to go to courses that help them unshackle from these traumas is already more than enough.

Remember, no matter how tough things get, life has a relentless knack for rebounding.

Get help today, live your better life tomorrow — RAINN

RAINN is the nation’s largest anti-sexual violence organization. RAINN created and operates the National Sexual Assault Hotline in partnership with more than 1,000 local sexual assault service providers across the country.

Call 800–656-HOPE(4673) or start a private live chat!

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Rhonda Swan

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